Hey Winifred,
I'd like you to have some insight into what life was like before and after you were born. These are my "letters" to you. I hope one day you can appreciate, or at least be amused by, them. Your Dad and I love ya, kid.
Your nap schedule has gone off the rails since you were feeling bad, so we haven't had a very consistent nap time music selection for a few days. Though, I did try singing a song from "Mary Poppins" to you today while you were fussy.
We went to the post office yesterday to mail the diaper covers I recently sold (there was one brand I bought early on that I hated from the beginning and you only wore a couple times). Hopefully, the mom who bought them likes them better than I did. When we were there, a lady asked how old you were... she guessed 5 or 6 months...
She was pretty surprised when I told her you'd be 3 months on Sunday...
(Those feet!)
You are so big, we kind of missed the window on the Bumbo seat. I got it out a couple days ago to see how you liked it, and you got kind of stuck in it. We took it back to Target as it was still in the box (I kept stuff in the box that you were too small to use), and it seemed silly to keep if you had already outgrown it. You wouldn't have used it too often anyway... you are still very much a snuggler and hate to be put down for more than a few minutes. I am totally cool with that - I will hold you for as long as you'll let me.
P.S. - I also think you might be cutting a tooth.. already.
You've started making the best sound ever - its like a really high pitched squeal. You keep doing it just to hear it again yourself. I love it. It is my favorite.
You are learning so many new things so fast. Just this week you've started grabbing at and holding onto objects, really embracing and rocking out tummy time (you always HATED it before now), and now this new awesome screech owl noise. You love to "stand up" in our laps and you are keeping your head pretty steady. You also can move your head from side to side to look at things now.
In not so fun news, we think you have a virus called "Roseola" - its not serious, but you have a red rash around your face, neck, and back, a bit of diarrhea, and your lymph nodes are swollen. You are sleeping a lot during the day and want to eat more often than usual. Hopefully you don't develop a fever or any other more serious symptoms. Unfortunately, there isn't anything we can do except wait it out. I hope it passes soon - nothing makes me feel more helpless than you feeling bad and me not being able to help. You are still mostly happy when you're awake, and during those times, I try to give you lots of cuddles and some quality visual and auditory stimulation.
We haven't really stuck to any nap time routine since you just sleep for a good portion of the day, but we did listen to music while I worked on my homework tonight. You liked "I Heard Ramona Sing" by Frank Black.
I toyed with the idea of naming you Ramona... but only for a bit - you were always gonna be Winifred Zuzu.
You are a little over 11 weeks old now. You are the most perfect person on the face of the earth.
This is the first time since you were born that I've had a chance to write you. You encompass my days pretty substantially, and I love it. Taking care of you, observing how much you've grown, developed, and learned over the past 11 weeks has been the best experience I have ever had. I love you even more than I expected when we were sharing my body (which is a lot). I keep meaning to sit down and type out your birth story, but I know it will take awhile, and I just haven't found the time to commit to it. We'll get there.
You like to be held - pretty much all the time - I'm holding you now as you sleep. I do a lot of things one handed, like typing. Sometimes you lay in your crib, awake, and look up at your mobile and giggle and coo - for about 5-10 mins, and then you are ready to be held and entertained by me or Dad. You and Dad are still kind of in the "getting to know you" phase, but it is getting better. While he's at work, you spend all day with me, and sometimes it makes you sad when I have to give you to him so I can take a shower, work on homework, or use the bathroom. Now that you are becoming more aware of the world, you appreciate your Dad and his silly faces more everyday - you've started frantically looking for him when he comes home and you first hear his voice.
You sleep with us, in our bed, and you've been sleeping there through the night since about your second or third week of existence. Before you were born, I didn't think we would co-sleep, but once we laid your tiny body into that giant pack-n-play next to our bed and you cried, I picked you up, laid you next to me, and knew you'd be there for awhile. It did make me nervous for the first few days (I was so terrified that I or your Dad would roll on top of you), but once I read up on how to do it safely, and realized I awoke at every little noise or move you made, I felt like it was the best place for you.
I am breastfeeding you, and I love it. We hit a few snags, like two bouts of thrush and a tongue tie (which you had clipped at about 4 weeks - you did well, but it was pretty traumatic for your Dad and me), but we kept at it, and now we are pretty freaking pro. You wanted to eat about every 30 minutes - an hour for the first 10 weeks (and when you were cluster feeding, it was more like every 2 minutes), but we're closer to about every two hours now, which is an amazing difference. Looking down at you while you eat and knowing that I am giving you what you need to grow is an awesome feeling. Seeing you get bigger every week is proof that what I am doing is keeping you healthy. I wouldn't trade the experience for anything.
You have never taken a liking to a pacifier, and that s O.K. with me. The few times we tried to give you one, you just spit it out, and who could blame you? I haven't pumped any milk for you yet, and I want to avoid giving you a bottle, but we are going to try cup feeding soon and we'll see how that goes. Since you're Dad makes it so I don't have to go to work, and I take online classes, I hardly ever have to be away from you, so feeding you from a bottle seems silly. Plus, in three more months, you'll be eating pureed veggies, and having breast milk immediately on hand won't be as big of an issue. I want us to keep breast feeding you until you are at least one, and I will let you decide when you are ready to wean.
You stayed with your Grams this weekend for a couple of hours while your Dad and I went to dinner. It was the first time we had left you for over a hour (you stayed with her once while we ran to the grocery store when you were about 7 or 8 weeks old). We took you over at nap time, so I thought you would sleep the whole time, but you decided sleep was not on the roster. Grams said you slept a bit and cried a bit, but you were awake for a good chunk of the time. We missed you a lot, and were glad when we got back and saw you and Grams taking a walk around her street. You seemed content to look at the trees (you love the outside), but you got fussy right as we pulled in.
You and I have a pretty solid routine during the day now. We wake up around 8AM (as Dad is getting up for work), I change your diaper, you eat, we say bye to Dad, and we go back to sleep around 8:30AM. We wake up again usually around 10:30AM and you eat again. We go back to sleep around 11AM and wake up again around 12:30PM (I know, right?). We change your diaper, you chill in your crib for awhile while I situate the dogs and maybe do some laundry (there is AWAYS laundry, especially your dirty cloth diapers), and then we play for a few hours. We read at least one book every day, and play on your play quilt, then we sing or just make faces at each other for awhile.
We change a few diapers here and there, eat a couple times, and then at 4, you get fussy, letting me know its time for your 4 o'clock nap. I get up, hold you close and bounce (you LOVE to bounce, but only a certain way - you are a very particular bouncer), and I sing to you until you fall asleep. You usually sleep about an hour - two hours. I generally try to do some homework during this time, but usually not unless something is due that day. I have to hold you in the rocker the whole time because if I lay you down, you wake up automatically and are usually cranky since you did not get a sufficient nap.
Then Dad is home. You eat, hang out with Dad for a bit, he and I either make dinner or he picks some food up on the way home and we eat. Then we usually watch some T.V. on Hulu or Netflix while we intermittently play with you/feed you/change you. Dad probably plays some video games at some point, and sometimes we might run an errand or two. You take a few cat naps in there too. We all go to bed between 10:30PM and 1AM. On the weekends, we spend a lot of time running around and seeing family so the weekend schedule is a bit different.
Everyone loves you - all of our family and our friends think you are the absolute best thing ever - I can't disagree. You are surrounded by so much awesome (and you give quite a bit of awesome off, yourself).
This was intended to be a much shorter posting about what songs I sing to you when its nap time, but it turned into more of a "life thus far" post. That happens to me a lot when I write - I get carried away. You're still asleep, and I typed this all one handed. I probably could have typed your birth story during this time...
Ah well, this is important stuff too.
Today you were sung to sleep by The Shins "New Slang."
Yesterday it was "Over at the Frankenstein Place" from the movie "Rocky Horror Picture Show," which is a film I am sure you'll come to know and love.
I am going to try to put all the songs I sing you here each day. I just sing whatever song pops into my head at the time, so it could be interesting.
Ok, the dogs are being loud, which means you are most likely about to stir, so I shall say goodbye my dear.
Today I moved all the notes I had written you from Tumblr to Google's Blogger site. Something about Tumblr was weirding me out...maybe it was all the porn.
Your Dad is out of town this week for work. I’m kind of a wreck. We really haven’t spent any length of time apart longer than a night over the past 9 years. We knew this would be a part of his new position at work, and we know it will be something that continues to happen a few times a year. Its still really hard for me to be without him. I have so many things I should be doing (like writing a pretty substantial paper which is due in two days and is worth half my grade), but I am having such a hard time staying focused. I miss him so much.
It probably is not the best idea to squirt oneself in the face with pesticides while pregnant. I don’t think any got in my mouth, so that’s a plus.
I need to learn to be more patient, but the idea of fleas in the house was making my skin crawl, and your Dad wasn’t here to apply the meds to all the pets. I am guessing there are probably worse things I’ve ingested or otherwise absorbed while I’ve been pregnant, but I’m still a little uneasy.
By far the worst thing about being pregnant has been all the things I am supposed to avoid. I hate being helpless in certain seemingly asinine situations (like bending over too far, or climbing up on a step stool, or painting, or carrying things over 35 pounds, or putting flea medication on my pets…).
You only have about three more weeks of cooking to do, so here is to hoping you don’t come out with anything weird.
